Monthly Archives: October 2021

Is Italy looking for an exit from the CoronaScam? Italian Department of Health revises all-time Covid deaths down from 130,000+ to… 3783.

As we have been saying in this space since the beginning, the entire CoronaScam was initially launched as an obvious MARKETING and RE-BRANDING CAMPAIGN, which was what the Event201 meeting in NYC on 18 October, ARSH 2019 was all about: getting the media, government and NGOs (with the Bergoglian Antichurch at the head of that list) organized and on the same page in preparation for the launch of the totalitarian putsch operation a few weeks later. They called the tactic, “Flooding the Zone.” Relentless, non-stop 24/7 propaganda terrorism.

The truth is that the launch of the CoronaScam was almost entirely a simple re-branding of seasonal cold and influenza DESIGNED TO BRING ABOUT COERCED MANDATORY INJECTIONS LYINGLY CALLED “vaccines”, which would then be leveraged into a digitized means of total economic control and engineered collapse of society, in preparation for a complete reorganization of human society under totalitarianism.

Over in Italy, the longshoremen – understanding exactly what evil lies behind the coerced injection GreenPass which the Italian government has declared a requirement to be employed IN ANY WAY in Italy – have blockaded the ports of Trieste and Genoa, effectively blocking the Suez Canal by cutting off the two main freight entrees into Europe. The longshoremen are doing this on behalf of all Italians, not just themselves, and their terms are simple: total, immediate, permanent cancellation of the “GreenPass”. They cannot be bought, and will not parley. Their terms are non-negotiable.

Which brings us to yesterday. The Italian Department of Health casually revised its death count from “Covid-19” down from over 130,000 to 3783.

Algorithmic translation here.

As we have been saying in this space since the beginning, hardly anyone dies of a cold or flu virus without having been severely ill or weakened beforehand. This is how human life has been since time immemorial. And, sure enough, the Italian Department of Health has quietly admitted that people rarely died FROM (per, in Italian), but rather WITH (con, in Italian) a cold virus.

Here is my reportage on this. Check the date, folks. March 24, ARSH 2020.

But that was all used as a terroristic and coercive pretext to inject people with what we now see (and suspected from the beginning) is a poison concoction that very clearly seems to be itself the “delta variant” and is OBVIOUSLY doing massive, permanent damage to heart tissue, the immune system and could be a sterilant – it’s simply too soon to know how the DeathJabs affect fertility, especially in children.

Is the Italian government desperately looking for a way to quit the CoronaScam that doesn’t involve politicians and apparatchiks hanging upside down by piano wire with their bits stuffed in their mouth after being put against the wall?

Let’s hope so.

12/20/2020 Paper: SARS-CoV-2 RNA reverse-transcribed and integrated into the human genome

Link here. Download the paper and share aggressively. To no one’s surprise, it looks like the mRNA has been engineered to permanently alter the human genome and thus make human beings themselves into viral mRNA production and shedding machines on the genomic level.

It was designed from the beginning, again, to no one’s surprise, to never, ever, ever end. An Everlasting Gobstopper for BigPharma, and a means of totalitarian control and eugenic population reduction for the New World Order oligarchs.

Abstract

Prolonged SARS-CoV-2 RNA shedding and recurrence of PCR-positive tests have been widely reported in patients after recovery, yet these patients most commonly are non-infectious. Here we investigated the possibility that SARS-CoV-2 RNAs can be reverse-transcribed and integrated into the human genome and that transcription of the integrated sequences might account for PCR-positive tests. In support of this hypothesis, we found chimeric transcripts consisting of viral fused to cellular sequences in published data sets of SARS-CoV-2 infected cultured cells and primary cells of patients, consistent with the transcription of viral sequences integrated into the genome. To experimentally corroborate the possibility of viral retro-integration, we describe evidence that SARS-CoV-2 RNAs can be reverse transcribed in human cells by reverse transcriptase (RT) from LINE-1 elements or by HIV-1 RT, and that these DNA sequences can be integrated into the cell genome and subsequently be transcribed. Human endogenous LINE-1 expression was induced upon SARS-CoV-2 infection or by cytokine exposure in cultured cells, suggesting a molecular mechanism for SARS-CoV-2 retro-integration in patients. This novel feature of SARS-CoV-2 infection may explain why patients can continue to produce viral RNA after recovery and suggests a new aspect of RNA virus replication.

Repost by Request: On Why Diabolical Narcissists in the Deep State WANT To Get Caught, Consciously WANT You to See Their Egregious Vote Fraud and Covidic Crimes Against Humanity

(Originally penned and posted 7 November, ARSH 2020, when any thought or mention of national edicts of the DeathInjection being required in order to be employed was called “tinfoil hat conspiracy theory”.)

I was having a conversation with someone not long ago about a case in Rome of a priest (Fr. Thomas Williams) who kept a female concubine/baby mama (Liz Lev) for many years, and how openly and shamelessly Fr. Williams and Liz Lev carried on their sacrilegious fornication. The person I was visiting with then postulated that either Fr. Williams, Liz Lev, or both of them WANTED to be caught, wanted to be exposed, wanted people to know the truth, even though they both were inveterate, dead-eyed, facile liars whenever confronted about their brazenly scandalous conduct.  I assured him that he was in fact correct, they DID want “to be caught”, but not for the reason he thought. He thought that they wanted to repent, to have the burden of their guilt lifted from them.  Would that it were so. That would indicate even a flicker of psycho-spiritual normalcy.  Sadly, the reality is exactly the opposite, and we see this today all around us, but most especially in the realm of politics, and the Antichurch.

The hideous truth is that Diabolical Narcissists / sociopaths / psychopaths have no interest in repentance, reform or apologies.  DNs define themselves by, and their entire warped psycho-spiritual existence revolves around, the notion that they are superior, a separate caste, distinct from and above other human beings. They are “the elite”.  They are “oligarchs”.  They are a “nouveau-aristocracy”. One of the main ways that this psycho-spiritual psychosis expresses itself is in terms of the law, and the Rule of Law. Hence the wildly disproportionate numbers of these demoniacs in government. (Remember The Barnhardt Axiom: seeking and/or holding public office, especially national-level office, is, in and of itself, proof that a given person is psychologically and morally unfit to hold public office.)

Have you noticed that the further a government descends into tyranny and evil, the thicker and thicker the code of statutes becomes?  On the surface, one would think that flagrant law-breakers in positions of power would tend toward anarchy, removing the “roadblocks” from the law that might jeopardize or imperil them as they pursue ever-increasing levels of power through criminal activity.  This is exactly wrong.  DNs, because they define themselves as “elite”, need a metric against which to measure and quantify their “eliteness”.  That metric is The Law, specifically the extent to which The LAW DOES NOT APPLY TO THEM.

It is precisely for this reason that DNs tend to be VERY enthusiastic about law qua law in a Pharisaical and tyrannical sense – because every new law is yet another potential way for the DN to manifest their superiority and otherness – by dispensing themselves from it. DNs wallow in hypocrisy like hogs wallow in fecal mud. If there were no law for DNs to dispense themselves from, there would be no distinction, no “otherness”, no over-and-aboveness relative to the unwashed masses.

This is why satan and the demons are, in fact, legalists.  They do not “love the law” in the good and healthy sense that we see and hear so often in scripture, and contemplate in the Fourth Joyful Mystery of the Rosary- the Presentation of Our Lord in the Temple, but in the sense that it is the law – and their shamelessly hypocritical flouting and breaking of it – that defines and “elevates” them above not only mankind, but also above the non-fallen angels, in their sick, warped, loveless rational intellects. And remember, DNs are the human analogues to demons.

But wait. It gets worse.

When DNs are confident that they have enough power, be it over a small group of people (family members, co-workers, social circle, cult), or on a macro scale, such as in a government, large corporation, or The Church, they will become progressively more bold and VISIBLE in their crimes in order to generate ever-higher amounts of diabolical narcissistic satisfaction.

Now here is where it gets interesting.  For DNs, the commission of their crimes and malefactions themselves are NOT the most potent source of diabolical satisfaction.  No – the real rush, the “high” that they crave more than anything is THE GETTING AWAY WITH IT. Specifically, DNs luxuriate in watching other people, whether it be out of fear or sycophancy, pretend to not see, or better yet lie to cover, or even better yet, positively defend and justify, their crimes.

Having planned and fantasized about his malevolent actions, the DN will watch and study those around him in the aftermath.  Every instance of “looking the other way” the DN sees gives him an even more intense rush, because to look away from his crimes is to capitulate and submit to him – an even more complete capitulation than the actual victim.  Every lie that a sycophant tells to cover for the DN is a rush.  Every groveling justification made on the DNs behalf for the DNs unjustifiable, or even criminal behavior, is like the rush of a drug – and far more psycho-spiritually potent than the initial act itself.

If your mind is cross-referencing islam, dhimmitude and the jizya tax, you’re right on.

If your mind is cross-referencing to the CoronaScam, yessir.

If your mind is cross-referencing to Antipope Bergoglio and his uncontested war against God and His Holy Church, you’re right on.

Do you now understand what drives Hillary Clinton, and what the whole “homebrew email server” thing was about? That was entirely about flouting the Rule of Law – consequences to others be damned, up to and including getting people killed.  Then Clinton, knowing full well that she is untouchable AND guilty as sin, sat back, watched, and luxuriated in the fact that her crimes, plastered all over the media, resulted in exactly ZERO consequences, while any other person would have been sent to prison for DECADES for doing exactly what she did.

What is going on now simultaneously with CoronaCold, the Masonic Burqa of Submission, and the lockdowns AND the obvious, open vote fraud in the 2020 election is exactly this – they want you to see, know, and GIVE UP. It is your giving up that is their ultimate psycho-fetish.

Do you understand what drives Antipope Bergoglio? Bergoglio knows EXACTLY what he is doing, and the consequences his actions are having, and he luxuriates in the fact that there are no consequences to him.  The remaining handful of so-called “conservative” Cardinals and Bishops (excepting +Viganò) are capitulating to him by looking away and remaining silent, and scores of others are lying and putting forth mendacious justifications on his behalf. And Antipope Bergoglio wallows in his porcine diarrheal mud sty, loving every second of it.

When a DN looks you in the eye, either in person, or on camera, and lies to your face, he thinks that you should be GRATEFUL to him for deigning to speak to you at all.

When a DN commits a crime against you, he thinks you should be GRATEFUL to him for tolerating your existence at all, and that you should come back for more abuse and be grateful for it, because you are, after all, a lower form of life.

This is why the pathological effeminacy of our culture is super-fuel for DN tyrants.  They are watching you.  They are watching your utter passivity, and it feeds them.  The musloids are watching as the men of Europe literally stand and stare as they rape their women and children in front of them.  The Deep State regime is watching you as they destroy your culture and stoke Civil War in front of you.  Antipope Bergoglio and the fags and Freemasons behind him are watching you as they scourge Christ and rape His Bride in front of you, and you defend him, and thank him for it – and continue to defend the lie that he is the Pope or ever was. They are all watching others actively and even enthusiastically defend and justify their wicked, heinous crimes, and it feeds them.

And it will only get worse from here, on a quadratic escalation curve, because once these people have power and momentum they never, ever back off. They are like sharks frenzying in chum.  Soon mere lying, mere treason, and mere contract killing will not generate a sufficient rush of diabolical satisfaction.  Soon, as with Lenin, Stalin, Mao and Kim, they will only be satisfied by committing their crimes in full, open view, as in public executions, “shoot on sight” orders, and then demanding not just your capitulation, but your undying gratitude. “It was FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.”

So yeah, they want to get caught.  They all want to get caught. But not because they have any interest in repentance or reform. They want you to see them break the rules, break the law, disenfranchise, enslave, and kill you, and then watch you fold in front of them and prove, once again, how vastly superior to you they are.

Two years ago today they held their final organizational meeting before launching the Covid Totalitarian Putsch, called “Event 201”. There is NO WAY IN HELL that this was a coincidence.

(Originally posted on 3 April, ARSH 2020. That’s how early we KNEW that the Covidic scam was a METICULOUSLY planned crime against humanity – the final New World Order move to plunge the world into totalitarianism.)

Folks, there is no possible way this is a coincidence. None. This is quite possibly the largest crime against humanity and crime against peace in human history, and the full consequences of it haven’t even begun to be manifested.

http://www.centerforhealthsecurity.org/event201/scenario.html

Recommendations

The next severe pandemic will not only cause great illness and loss of life but could also trigger major cascading economic and societal consequences that could contribute greatly to global impact and suffering. The Event 201 pandemic exercise, conducted on October 18, 2019, vividly demonstrated a number of these important gaps in pandemic preparedness as well as some of the elements of the solutions between the public and private sectors that will be needed to fill them. The Johns Hopkins Center for Health Security, World Economic Forum, and Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation jointly propose these recommendations.

When/where

Friday, October 18, 2019
8:45 a.m. – 12:30 p.m.
The Pierre hotel
New York, NY

Audience

An invitation-only audience of nearly 130 people attended the exercises, and a livestream of the event was available to everyone. Video coverage is available here.

Exercise team

Eric Toner, MD, is the exercise team lead from the Johns Hopkins Center for Health Security. Crystal Watson, DrPH, MPH and Tara Kirk Sell, PhD, MA are co-leads from the Johns Hopkins Center for Health Security. Ryan Morhard, JD, is the exercise lead from the World Economic Forum, and Jeffrey French is the exercise lead for the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation.

Exercise team members are Tom Inglesby, MD; Anita Cicero, JD; Randy Larsen, USAF (retired); Caitlin Rivers, PhD, MPH; Diane Meyer, RN, MPH; Matthew Shearer, MPH; Matthew Watson; Richard Bruns, PhD; Jackie Fox; Andrea Lapp; Margaret Miller; Carol Miller; and Julia Cizek.

Event 201 was supported by funding from the Open Philanthropy Project.

The Event 201 scenario

Event 201 simulates an outbreak of a novel zoonotic coronavirus transmitted from bats to pigs to people that eventually becomes efficiently transmissible from person to person, leading to a severe pandemic. The pathogen and the disease it causes are modeled largely on SARS, but it is more transmissible in the community setting by people with mild symptoms.

The disease starts in pig farms in Brazil, quietly and slowly at first, but then it starts to spread more rapidly in healthcare settings. When it starts to spread efficiently from person to person in the low-income, densely packed neighborhoods of some of the megacities in South America, the epidemic explodes. It is first exported by air travel to Portugal, the United States, and China and then to many other countries. Although at first some countries are able to control it, it continues to spread and be reintroduced, and eventually no country can maintain control.

There is no possibility of a vaccine being available in the first year. There is a fictional antiviral drug that can help the sick but not significantly limit spread of the disease.

Since the whole human population is susceptible, during the initial months of the pandemic, the cumulative number of cases increases exponentially, doubling every week. And as the cases and deaths accumulate, the economic and societal consequences become increasingly severe.

The scenario ends at the 18-month point, with 65 million deaths. The pandemic is beginning to slow due to the decreasing number of susceptible people. The pandemic will continue at some rate until there is an effective vaccine or until 80-90 % of the global population has been exposed. From that point on, it is likely to be an endemic childhood disease.

Media

Statement about nCoV and our pandemic exercise

Thank you to members of the press that attended Event 201. There are opportunities for those that missed it to view a video of the exercise online now, and to use materials posted on this page to share the insights of leaders of business and industry, governments, and global health about why pandemic preparedness collaboration among private businesses with the public sector is so critically important at this time.

Recommendations issued by the Johns Hopkins Center for Health Security in collaboration with the World Economic Forum and the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation are available here.

 

Part 3: HUMAN RESPECT: A MOST DISASTROUS PERSECUTION OF THE CHURCH

(The third and final part of the sermon by Rev. FERREOL GIRARDEY, C.SS.R., Imprimatur ARSH 1915. Emphases mine.)

The terrible persecutions waged against the Church during the first three centuries of her existence made many millions of martyrs; but their blood was the seed of Christians, for their number increased with the number of martyrs, whose bodies alone suffered. The Church had, and has still, reason to rejoice over the great number of her martyrs; she honors these heroic defenders of the faith by celebrating their feasts, their praises; by erecting churches and altars in their honor, venerating their relics and proposing their examples and virtues to our imitation. But human respect, on the contrary, is the worst of her persecutors and robs the Church of numberless children and precipitates them into the endless torments of the infernal abyss.

Human respect attacks the souls of men, corrupts their morals, weakens and even destroys the faith of its victims, drags them into hell, and thus renders vain the blood and death of Jesus Christ and the ministrations of His Church. Human respect causes the very children of the Church to wage a relentless war on her! Although the Church does not undergo a bloody persecution thereby, she has every reason to utter these complaints: “Behold in peace is my bitterness most bitter” (Is. 38. 17). “Who will give water to my head and a fountain of tears to my eyes? And I will weep day and night for the (spiritually) slain of the daughter of my people” (Jer. 9. i). Human respect is the accursed murderer of the souls of so many Catholics! Hence St. Augustine indignantly exclaims : “Woe to thee, O stream of human custom (respect), how long wilt thou toss about the children of Eve in the great and dangerous sea ?”

St. Peter became a victim of human respect, for not withstanding his ardent love of Jesus and his firm resolution to die with Him, he nevertheless, swayed by human respect and the fear of the company he was in, shamefully denied Him. Pontius Pilate several times emphatically acknowledged the innocence of Jesus, and even did so whilst condemning Him to die on the cross; but he had not the courage to displease the Jewish rabble and despise the danger of incurring Cesar’s displeasure. Incalculable is the immense multitude of the victims of human respect on account of the weakening and loss of the faith, the neglect of keeping the commandments of God and of the Church, the loss of innocence through bad company, profane and dangerous amusements, conniving at dishonest practices, etc. The loss of faith results not from arguments alleged against it, but from human respect and yielding to one’s passions. “What So and So will say” often causes the shipwreck of the best resolutions!

Human respect is the idol worshiped by many Catholics. It is a dishonorable, contemptible and disgraceful yoke and slavery which the world imposes on its votaries. He who yields to it, is ashamed of Jesus Christ and practically denies Him. Of him Jesus Christ says: “He that shall be ashamed of Me and of My words, of him the Son of man shall be ashamed, when He shall come in His majesty to judge mankind (Luke 9. 26). Unless such a one sincerely repents and changes his life, he will surely forfeit his salvation. On the other hand, he who never yields to human respect, “he who is not ashamed of Jesus Christ,” says Tertullian, “is certain of salvation.” In fact, our divine Saviour says so Himself: “Every one that shall confess Me before men, I will also confess him before My Father, who is in heaven” (Mat. 10. 32).

Source: Sermon Matter by Rev. FERREOL GIRARDEY, C.SS.R., Imprimatur 1915

A sobering read: Critical Race Theory and all Marxist social projects ultimately create Diabolical Narcissists whose trajectory is explicitly suicidal

By now most people have seen this image of an obese black sodomite woman who is hired to give luciferian workshops on “Critical Race Theory”.

We look at this and roll our eyes and shake our heads in a combination of revulsion and pity, but then we move on.

Something prompted me to go to this sick woman’s website as written on her flip board, and what I found was far more disturbing than even I, jaded as I am, ever expected.

This woman is AGGRESSIVELY suicidal. The demonic emotional palette has so utterly consumed this woman that she is totally devoid of any hope or capacity for happiness. She is already in hell. THIS is Diabolical Narcissism in its most advanced form.

I’m reminded of another psychopath narcissist black-ish woman who claimed that she was suicidal due to “racism”: Meghan Markle.

The thing about suicidal narcissists is that they have a very nasty habit of becoming MURDEROUS suicidal narcissists. Cross reference: the islamic political faux-religion.  Why? Because like the demons they emulate, Diabolical Narcissists are fueled and animated by SPITE. It is the perfect inversion of the One True Faith – love of neighbor proceeding from the love of God.  That inverts to hatred of neighbor and hatred of self proceeding from a hatred of God who is pure Love.

I’m going to post Shackelford’s essay “Nowhere to be suicidal, nowhere to be free” in full so that if her website is deleted, there will be a record here of the pure evil of the Marxist/CRT religion carried to its full, satanic fruition.

Folks, this is NOT SATIRE. She’s deathly serious, and organizations pay her to “improve culture”.


Nowhere to be suicidal, nowhere to be free

By Hunter Ashleigh Shackelford

CW: Suicidality, Suicidal Ideation

Where do you go when the world wants you dead and the people who love you want you free? Where do you run when there is nowhere to hide from antiblack violence, and there’s nowhere to tell the truth about wanting to die?

Am I allowed to be honest?

I want to die. No one can save me. I don’t want to live, here. I don’t want to live, at all. If I could die today knowing it wouldn’t create more death for the people who make life worth something, I would.

Don’t call 911. Don’t call my therapist. Don’t report my posts on Twitter. Don’t reach out to my friends. Don’t make a post online looking for me. Don’t run away when I ask you to listen to my tears and hold my truth. Please don’t make me pretend that I want to live.

In Audre Lorde’s poem ‘Litany for Survival,’ she says, “When we are silent, we are still afraid; So it is better to speak remembering we were never meant to survive.” I want to speak. I want to scream. I want to be forthright. But we can’t be honest if the consequence is a cage. Anytime the state is called for those of us navigating suicide, the result is being institutionalized or being killed. When resources for suicide are offered, many of those spaces force you into silence or performance because the expectation is that access to support means you’ll develop a will to live. When we tell people who love us that we want to die, everyone rushes to fix us or shush us. We were never meant to survive, and there isn’t anywhere to speak on how we’re not surviving.

Suicide, for many of us, is a response to a world designed to kill us. Suicide can be an intervention to trauma, unmet needs, and a way to end our pain. Suicide, for some of us, is a way to reclaim power and choice as oppressed people when nothing happening to us is within our control and when state violence is quotidian. Suicide, for many of us, is sometimes not about ending your life but seeking ways to end our despair when no other options exist. And even still, we are demanded that we live through it, find a way, make it make sense, remain quiet, maintain suffering pending joy, or pretend for the sake of everyone else.

I’ve tried to kill myself four times consciously. The first time was when I was 11 and the most recent time was last year. I’ve also probably tried to kill myself a million times unconsciously through toxic coping mechanisms, through organizing against the state, through being a reckless ass nigga, and by overstaying relationships where only death was served. And I’m still here dying to die. Nothing has made me feel “better” and nothing has changed my mind. Nothing has intervened antiblackness and nothing has stopped the daily demand for Black death. Nothing has changed. I’m still incurably sad. I’m still a forever suicidal ass nigga.

Can anyone hold these devastating truths? Am I allowed to be still in wanting to die without punishment? Can I please go, or at least tell you that I want to go even if I don’t? Will you hate me more than this unliveable world? Will you resent me more than the inevitable consequence of being Black? Is it possible to hold me with love, with ease, and without guilt?

I wish that the people who love me could live in the escapism that I am a whole person who wants to live forever with my niggas, because who am I to ruin their fantasies of me that keep them more alive. I wish I could avoid being the reason for a life-shattering tragedy and imparting sadness on other people. I wish I wanted to be here. I wish I wasn’t a burden in a world that buries us.

The most unimaginable loneliness of suicidality is that not only does the world demand you live but the people who love you can’t hold your truth without dying too. Everyone is heartbroken from your inability to stay, and no one has the capacity to hear that you will leave them more alone in this forsaken world. No one can hold your hand because they can’t bear to lose your pulse. No one can listen to your cries because they can’t help but cry too. The wellness, care, and affirmation of the people you love become another weight you have no strength to hold.

So this essay is for niggas who want to die and can’t, don’t, failed, or haven’t yet.

This is for the niggas who can’t imagine another day surviving antiblackness. This is for the niggas who can’t endure this world in any capacity, despite the love and care that may exist here. This is for the niggas who can’t breathe and who were never given breath. This is for the sad-ass niggas who just don’t have it to give. This is for the niggas who can’t kill the niggas who tried to kill them, so you have to kill yourself. This is for the niggas who experienced unspeakable trauma and can’t undo the impact, so they become undone. This is for the niggas who never had a chance, who chased chance knowing it missed them, who had the potential to be no one, who would’ve made it if the world didn’t unmake them. This is for the niggas who can never access desire or love or life the way you deserve. This is for the niggas who can’t leave their niggas behind, so they stay knowing it’s insufferable and worth it at once. This is for the regular degular niggas who walk in front of moving cars and jump off buildings just cause. This is for the niggas who are scared as fuck to take those pills, to cut their wrists, to sever access to air, to die painfully because this world is already anguishing enough. This is for the niggas who are dying just by being here, who are already dead because the world said so.

As I sit here contemplating dying, I realize that there is no place to run. There’s probably someone reporting this essay as we speak because they believe I’m a harm to myself and my readers. There’s probably someone asking if I’m okay in my comments despite that there isn’t an ‘okay’ I’ll ever embody. There are probably 17 missed calls from my mom who’s terrified that this time is different than the last. My broken heart breaks everyone else’s so every morning I tape the pieces together to pretend that I’m fine.

It’s another Tuesday. I’m still suicidal, and I’m still here.