Monthly Archives: October 2013

The One About Your Pinch of Incense to Al Gore (Cable & Satellite Fees)

Originally penned and posted on January 13, ARSH 2013.  Bit o’ language in this one.  It is also now permalinked on “The One About…” page.

I caught an interesting factoid while reading a story about Algore selling his Marxist agitprop cable station to Al Jazeera last week. When it was first reported that Gore was selling CurrentTV, it was reported that CurrentTV received cable and satellite licensing revenues of $0.12 per month per subscriber – that is the pinch of incense you people who had CurrentTV included in your cable/sat package were paying to Algore. It mattered not that you never, ever turned CurrentTV on, or even knew that it was included in your package. Your $0.12 per month multiplied together put $80 million per year in cashflows into Algore’s hands in order to spread his evil, satanic filth.

The interesting factoid released last week was that cable/sat licensing revenues comprised 80% of CurrentTV’s revenue, with the other 20% coming from on-air advertising. I did not realize that these channels were THAT budgetarily dependent on the cable/sat fees. I would have thought that advertising revenue was in excess of 50% of their total revenue. I was very, very wrong in that assumption.

The point is, you people are paying for this crap, and they are TOTALLY dependent on your monthly pinches of incense. You and your tacit consent via your continued patronage of the cable/sat market are absolutely, positively, without question the entire driving force behind all of it. If they lose the cable/sat licensing revenues, it’s lights out, right now. The ad revenue is not even close to sufficient to keep them afloat. That’s just the walking around money to them.

How ironic that they are making the lion’s share of their money off of people who never, ever watch their channel, but are too apathetic to withdraw their consent and their dollars.  And it isn’t just Algore and CurrentTV.  It is MTV and their utterly satanic sewage.  It is the “gay” channel.  It is Oprah’s neo-pagan cult channel – rotting the brains and souls out of one middle-aged suburban Kathy at a time.  It is MSNBC.  It is FoxNews and its insidious ploy to dupe people like you into thinking that the Republic is still intact, and that “Republicans” are actually fighting against the Obama regime, and that all of this will be straightened out once we “take back the Senate and maybe even the White House!”, and that the Obama regime is merely an incompetent, left-of-center historical speedbump.  Rah! Rah!  Yay America!  It’s bread and circuses for people like you – people with 20 IQ points on the average “Dancing With the Stars” viewer.  O’Reilly, Krauthammer, Kelley, Hannity – none of these people will touch the truth with a ten foot pole, and never will.  Because the Truth in days like these leads to toilet scrubbing.  “Centrist moderation”, aka lying by both commission and omission, leads to eight-figure annual pay packages.  They have made their choice, you must make your choice.  I damn sure have made mine.

YOU made this psychopathic monster a nine-figure millionaire. If that doesn’t convince you of the need to TURN THE SHIT OFF, then I just don’t know what to say.

This man is a psychopath and a predator.  YOU have made him a nine-figure millionaire.  YOU.  Because you refuse to cancel your cable/satellite.  When I say "Iniquitous Gutter Republic", I mean it.

This man is a psychopath and a predator. YOU have made him a nine-figure millionaire. YOU. Because you refuse to cancel your cable/satellite. When I say “Iniquitous Gutter Republic”, I mean it.

Those aren’t boobs, folks.

Such a coincidence!  I found this picture of Artemis/Diana on the FreeRepublic thread about my “Why can’t I keep my insurance?” post below, and just had to chime in.  Those round thingies have been mistaken for breasts for centuries, and there even exist fountains made in the Renaissance in which nipples are added and water shoots forth from each “breast”.  Thus, this image of Artemis/Diana has been used as an allegory for the welfare state, with “a boob for every suckling welfare piglet”.

Coincidentally, just Saturday I was in a conversation about this very thing, and it turns out that the round thingies that Artemis/Diana has around her neck are NOT boobs.

They are a necklace of the TESTICLES of her slaughtered victims.  Remember, Diana is the HUNTRESS.

Isn’t this little bit of allegory perfect?  People are drawn to and then snuggle up to Artemis (the welfare state) attracted by the boob-like thingies, thinking that she is going to suckle them with her sweet milk of free s***, and then CHOP!  Their testicles are added to her necklace.

Life lesson #8753:  You had better learn to tell the difference between boobs and testicles.

Those aren't boobs, gentlemen.

Those aren’t boobs, gentlemen.

Machiavelli: Now in 4-D!

So a friend gave me a copy of Niccolo Machiavelli’s “The Prince” a while back since I had to give away my library.  Thus reads the hand-printed inscription:

Dear Ann,
I think that we can easily suffer the loss of many goods, but never that of a good library – not easily at any rate.  Please allow me to make this small contribution.  By way of explaining the choice I should add that a horrible human being, by the name of Sun Tzu (had Old Nick [Machiavelli] here known of him, he would have been greatly admired,) wrote: “If you know your enemies and know yourself, you will not be imperiled in a hundred battles.”  It is good advice despite of who gives it.

Yes.  People see a potentially Machiavellian character in me.  This is a legitimate worry.  There is nothing more dangerous in this world than an intelligent person who can speak well before large groups, is a natural leader, and who JUST WANTS TO HELP.

C.S. Lewis said it best:
“Of all tyrannies a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive.”

Yup.  This is why I have crowned myself Empress of the Calcified Deuce.  You may call me “La Deuce”.  This is my crest:
2-of-hearts

And this is me holding my Royal Mace:
"In the name of My Most Royal Majesty, I knight thee. Arise, Sir Loin of Beef. Arise, Earl of Cloves. Arise, Duke of Brittingham. Arise, Baron of Munchausen. Arise, Essence of Myrrh, ... Milk of Magnesia, ... Quarter of Ten."

Niccolo Machiavelli was a politician (read psychopath rat-bastid) in Florence in the 16th century.  “The Prince” was a letter written to the Medici family as a handbook for being rotten, rat-bastid oligarchs without the unwashed masses ever catching on.

DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR??

“The Prince” is pretty much the playbook for Jacobin-Marxist-Leninist-Stalinist-Gramsci-Alinsky-Obamaist milieu.  If you want to understand how your precious, darling Iniquitous Gutter Republic is being run by psychos in both parties, just read “The Prince”.  My favorite bit is the whole “it is probably good to *appear* as if you believe in God because the filthy masses, who could totally hang you from the bridge by your squishy bits at any time, eat that s*** up, but you really shouldn’t because it totally gets in the way of your raping and drinking the blood of everyone and everything you come in contact with” bit.

Assume the position.  Head down.  Eyes closed.  Hands in front of junk.  Oooooh.  We prayin' now, suckas!

Assume the position. Head down. Eyes closed. Hands in front of junk. Oooooh. We prayin’ now, suckas!

The point I want to make here comes from chapter 16 of “The Prince”, regarding keeping the unwashed masses mollified by appearing “generous”:

“A prince either spends his own money and that of his subjects, or that of others.  In the first case he must be economical; in the second he must not hold back any part of his generosity.  For the prince who goes out with his armies and lives by looting, sacking, and ransoms, and who lays hands on the property of others, such generosity is necessary; otherwise he would not be followed by his soldiers.

Remember, in this context, Machiavelli’s use of the word “generosity” is NOT referring to the sincere application of the virtue of generosity, because, you know, he’s totally being all Machiavellian here.  He is cynically talking about giving people free s*** in order to maintain his own wealth and power and not get hung from the bridge by his squishy bits.

For you all still clinging to the Iniquitous Gutter Republic that was America, what has happened for the first time in history is that the Machiavellian strategy of stealing other people’s money in order to give away free s*** and maintain the faux appearance of generosity to the people who could hang you from the bridge by your squishy bits has now reached its ultimate and inevitable evil climax.  Instead of stealing horizontally in real time from conquered territories, or even from a numerically small and easily vilified upper class, and then the middle class bogged down to complete inertia by its own material decadence, the “princes” of our day are victimizing a class of people that are totally incapable of resisting or defending themselves against the princes in any way.

Yep.  People who haven’t been born yet.

$222 trillion in unfunded U.S. government liabilities, aka “free s***”.  $1.5 quadrillion in global  derivatives.  Debt in quantities that the human mind is incapable of apprehending in anything but the most abstract terms.  And the defense barrier against the people from whom this theft is largely occurring is utterly impenetrable.  It makes the oceans look like raindrops.  It makes the moon seem like the house across the street.  Their army can never mount a defense against it.  Their munitions can never penetrate it.

Time.

The one and only hope those people have is US.  They are at OUR mercy.  The only thing that stands between the Prices of our day and their evil heirs, and those people’s slavery is OUR CHARITY – the love of neighbors that will not be born until long after we are dead.

Don’t be Machiavellian.  Exercise true virtue for the love of God and for the love of your fellow man – including in the 4th dimension.

Maybe I’ll see you on the bridge.  I’ll bring my mace and then you can decide whether I go over the side by my squishy bits or if we walk off the bridge together and go drink a gin and tonic somewhere.  No matter what happens, the toilets aren’t going to clean themselves.  Just sayin’.

 

“Why can’t I keep my insurance?” Because you’re stupid, sweetie.

Okay.  This all goes to my screaming rants that people are responsible for their government.  I’m getting really sick of people acting all indignant and acting like they’re being ambushed by this whole ObamaCare thing.

“Er my gawsh, y’all!  My insurance bill just quadrupled.  I’m serious you guys!”

Well, no kidding.  What in the blue firey blazes did you expect?  Let’s see.  Insurance is risk pooling.  A bunch of people get together and pay a small amount of money into a pool, and then when one of the people has an adverse event happen to them, the frequency of which can be broadly statistically predicted, then the pool pays out to the unlucky person who had the adverse event happen to them.

Now let’s see.  From DAY FLIPPING ONE the Obama regime has been saying that mean old insurance companies will not be able to turn away customers with pre-existing conditions – in other words, insurance companies will have to let people JOIN THE RISK POOL … AFTER THE RISK EVENT HAS ALREADY HAPPENED.

Um, yeah.  That is the total, complete destruction of the entire insurance paradigm.  This isn’t my opinion.  This is a mathematical fact … an extremely simple and elementary mathematical fact.  If people who have already had the adverse risk event happen to them must be allowed into the risk pool, then it is no longer a risk pool.  It is a wealth redistribution scam that victimizes the TOTAL, COMPLETE MORONS who enter and pay into the “pool” without already having had the risk event happen to them.

How can a nation of 330 million people, iniquitous gutter republic though it may be, not understand this?  How can a nation of 330 million people have their tyrannical regime tell them in no uncertain terms that the entire insurance paradigm is going to be destroyed by said regime, and then when it happens everyone acts all shocked?

Oh, and then add onto that the fact that ObamaCare requires insurance to cover all kinds of bee-ess “preventative” and “elective” services.  Well, if every single person in a risk pool is guaranteed to have a claim because the coverage is no longer for catastrophes, but also for purely non-emergent, elective pseudomedicine and outright quackery, then what do you expect?  The “pool” has to collect more than it pays out.  Period.

Finally, Karl Denninger broke the news today that most ObamaCare-compliant insurance has wicked in-network restrictions.  As in if you receive any healthcare “out of network” you get ZERO coverage – and there is not one word of disclosure of any of this until AFTER you have bought the policy.  And “out of network” has gone from generally meaning within a STATE to within a COUNTY, because, you know, competition is BAD or something.

So let’s recap.  ObamaCare requires you to pay for slaughtering babies.  We have known this for years.  It utterly destroys the insurance paradigm by mathematical definition and necessity.  We have known this since day one because it is a pure function of logic and math.  Doctors and health professionals are retiring and quitting by the thousands.  This has been happening for years.  Your insurance premiums, which are now “mandatory” according to the state – yes, the state is now dictating to you that you MUST purchase a SERVICE COMMODITY as a condition of LEGALLY WAKING UP BREATHING in the iniquitous gutter republic and steaming satanic cesspit of baby-killing, sodomy and theft formerly known as the united states of america, have now skyrocketed, and you would have to be dumber than a box of hair to not see that coming.

Well, at what point does the inability to think through excruciatingly simple logical progressions and their inevitable consequences become moral culpability?  At what point does the tolerance of the utterly irrational call down the thunder upon one’s own head?  At what point does shrugging one’s shoulders at the blood-soaked ground beneath one’s own feet and muttering some sissy bee-ess about “not having any choice” become full-blown cooperation?

Right now.  Right. Flipping. Now.

ObamaCare is yours now.  YOU personally own it, because you refuse to do ANYTHING to stop it, and you have known from day one what it was and thus what it would do.

1. Media strike
2. Tax strike
3. General strike
4. Armed counter-revolution

Step 4 should have happened YEARS ago.

Please note that sitting on your butt and sending emails to all of your friends saying, “Isn’t this awful,” and, “Someone really should do something about this,” isn’t accomplishing anything, and your inaction is emboldening the enemy with each passing day.

Hoist the Battle Standard of Jesus Christ and FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!

 

Starting Monday Off Right

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Christ the Democratically Elected Official.  NOT.  Deal, Americanist heretics.

Christ the Democratically Elected Official – NOT. Deal, Americanist heretics.

The Postcommunion of the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass from yesterday’s Feast of the Kingship of Our Lord Jesus Christ:

We have received the food of immortality and beg, Lord, that we who are proud to fight under the banner of Christ our King, may reign with Him forever in His realm above….

Wow.  That implies that we should be, like, FIGHTING, or something.  At least, that’s how I am interpreting the word “FIGHT”.  As, er, “FIGHT”.  But I’m sure that’s probably all wrong and Fr. Call-Me-Kevyn will email me and tell me how it is that the word “FIGHT” actually means “encounter and dialogue” and possibly “stare deeply into each other’s eyes and then engage in a long, lingering embrace of mutual respect and non-verbal affirmation”.

Nah.  Fight means fight.  FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

 

Musical Interlude: Sweet Surrender by Sarah McLachlan

While we’re waiting for the Slotted Spoon of Judgment and Discrimination auction to mature, let’s have a musical interlude.  Can you guess why I like this song?  Here are the lyrics (with my adjustment in red), straight out of ’97 and on VINYL even!  Enjoy!

It doesn’t mean much.
It doesn’t mean anything at all.
The life I’ve left behind me
Is a cold room.

I’ve crossed the last line
From where I can’t return.
Where every step I took in faith (MADE) me
And led me from my home.

Sweet surrender
Is all that I have to give.

Take me in.
No questions asked.
You strip away the ugliness
That surrounds me.

Are you an angel?
Am I already that gone?
I only hope that
I won’t disappoint You
When I’m down here
On my knees.

And I don’t understand
How by the touch of Your hand
I would be the one to fall.

I miss the little things.
I miss everything about You.

It doesn’t mean much.
It doesn’t mean anything at all.
The life I’ve left behind me
Is a cold room.

Barnhardt Estate Sale: The Slotted Wooden Spoon of Judgment & Discrimination

 

WoodenSpoonofDiscrimination

 

Ann Barnhardt’s Slotted Wooden Spoon of Judgment and Discrimination

My eBay handle is 720ann.  My PayPal I.D. is Ann@Barnhardt.biz .  Purchasing, bidding, looking or just merely thinking about any of this sends you straight to the top of some FEDGOV list, so you’ll have that going for you, which is nice.

Are you judgmental?  Are you prone to not merely discrimination, but discrimination with extreme prejudice?  Then do I have the spoon for you!  Have you ever stood over a pot of freshly-boiled dumplings and said to yourself, “I like dumplings.  Dumplings are good.  But the cooking water is bad.  I wish I had a tool to help me discriminate in favor of the dumplings and against the cooking water so I could serve the good and excellent dumplings to my family and friends and throw the cooking water into the sewer.  I don’t want to serve my family and friends nasty cooking water, but I don’t want to throw any good dumplings down the sewer, either.  If only there was a tool that could help me judge and then discriminate dumpling from wastewater.  Sigh.”

You are bidding on a slotted wooden spoon from the estate of Ann Barnhardt.  A spoon that allows you to judge and then discriminate with extreme prejudice – without ever having to leave the comfort of your own kitchen. It is made out of wood.  Very JUDGMENTAL, DISCRIMINATORY wood. In fact, when I originally purchased this spoon, I judged it and then discriminated against countless other spoons in its favor.  This spoon was literally borne from judgment and discrimination.  And now, all of that judgment, all of that discrimination can be yours.

Who am I to judge?  Who are you to judge?  I dunno.  This is why we have slotted spoons.  Oh, and this is also why we have the Church, the Magisterium and the Scriptures – so we can “judge all things” (1 Corinthians 2:15) and “prove all things; holding fast that which is good.” (1 Thessalonians 5:21).   No reserve.  Free shipping.  Ann Barnhardt has Tridentine Masses said for her benefactors.

I’ll have a Manhattan, Up. Thanks.

1.  I have used every possible word for “miscellany” so now I’m going to title these mish-mash (used that too) posts with cocktail orders, because a little virtual drankin’ is in order, methinks.  A Manhattan is two parts Rye Whiskey, one part sweet vermouth and a dash of angostura bitters, shaken, served in a chilled martini glass with a marischino cherry garnish.  Nom nom nom.  Drinky-winky, Possum.

2.  Many, many thanks to the buyer and all of the bidders on the Rainbow whisk.  It sold for an amazing $350.  Your munificense never ceases to amaze me.  The next listing will be the Slotted Wooden Spoon of Judgment and Discrimination.  After that will be the Silicone Basting Brush of Dialogue and Encounter.

3.  I am really, really struggling to summon the energy to comment on the theatrics and farce in Washington.  I truly think that if at this point a person STILL doesn’t get that all politicians – ALL … ALL OF THEM are lying politicking whores and psychopaths who are in it purely for the money and personal powertrip and that all “politics” is pure, contrived theater that makes professional wrestling look like epitome of sincerity and truth by comparison, I’m just going to go ahead and call it and fill out the toe tag.

"It's utterly critical that we win back the Senate and the White House.  Yay America!"  Youbetcha.

The alternative is indifference.  So, I guess I’ll just have to keep beating my head on walls and pieces of sturdy furniture.  And rocks.  Rocks are good, too.

3.  There are now basically two camps on the ObamaCare website fiasco.  There is a camp that says that the site was built to crash and cause denial of service attacks on itself because the regime didn’t want people to see that insurance premiums are skyrocketing.  There is another camp of IT guys that says that the entire website is a Potemkin Village – that it is just a front-end facade with a data entry form, and that there is no real code underneath the facade to actually sell people insurance on an “exchange”.  This is VERY plausible.  When massive database code is written, it is broken up into tiny tasks with each task assigned to a team.  When the Red Team finishes Task A and the Blue Team finishes Task B, the Yellow Team is tasked with knitting the Task A code together with the Task B code.  And once that is done, that finished bit, called Part D is then married to Part E which was created in the same way, and that goes on and on for level upon level.  There are entire companies that do nothing but micro-manage these tasks and teams so that a massive, whole database project can be accomplished.  What this means is that an entire group or even company is totally unaware of what is going on elsewhere in the project, because all they focus on is their specific taskset.  So, the guys who wrote the front-end code would have no clue and no way of knowing that no one was writing any code to create a functioning insurance exchange.  Everyone would just ASSUME that it was happening – just not in their office, or even their company, and they would happily write and pass their code for their tasks up the chain assuming and trusting that the whole ObamaCare exchange project was, you know, REAL.  So… where did the $650,000,000.00 go?  Oh, I couldn’t even begin to hazard a guess…

They're smirking for a reason.  It's because they are stealing all of your money, and you refuse to stop them.

They’re smirking for a reason. It’s because they are stealing all of your money, and you refuse to stop them.

4.  For your “Fruits of Francis” file:

Ann,
Today I went to Mass at a [Novus Ordo] Parish I try to avoid but I woke up late and wasn’t able to attend the Maronite Mass I usually attend during the week.  Five minutes before Mass began a woman stood up and said “Let’s recite the Angelus,” and we did.  The readings today were about Christ rebuking the Pharisees and wouldn’t you know it but the priest used the readings to point out in his sermon the arrogance of praying devotions and the fact that saying them “MEANS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING” unless you have inside you a burning heart like Jesus helping the needy blah blah blah.

Now, you might say that the priest is right, but no.  Praying devotions like the Angelus and the Rosary are NOT contingent on whether or not you FEEEEEL something.  You should pray them even if you feel numb and spiritually bone dry.  You should pray even if you are angry, sad, pooped or frustrated.  You should pray if you feel like a zombie and find yourself without a single flying flip left to give.  In fact, it is in those times that some of the most intense infusions of grace occur.  The key is remembering that God is the actor and He really doesn’t need you to be all “jazzhands for Jesus” if He wants to go to work on you.  In fact, let’s just say what needs to be said here:  99.9% of the “jazzhands for Jesus” schtick that you see is fakety-fake-fake-fake.  Forced smiles, ponderous lip-biting, hand-waving, sing-songy insincere speech inflections, GLAZED, EVASIVE EYES.  Blecgh.

What praying these devotions, and most especially going to Mass and Adoration, does is open the door for Him.  Remember, God is a Gentleman and will never come over uninvited, much less break in by force.  Even if all you can do is unlock the door and barely leave it ajar and then lay down in a puddle, that’s fine.  But you have to give Him a way in.  The Angelus, the Rosary, Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament and ESPECIALLY Mass – just do it.  Even if you think your heart is an ice-cold lump of coal before, during and after.  We generally do not physically or consciously perceive the infusion of grace in real time.

Hey!  So let’s take these Fruits of Francis and make a smoothie!  Let’s all learn the Angelus!  It was traditionally said at 6:00am, noon and 6:00pm.  All of the churches used to ring their bells, and everyone would stop and say the Angelus.  It is a prayer of thanksgiving for the Incarnation – God taking on human flesh.

V. The angel of the Lord declared unto Mary,
R. And she conceived by the Holy Spirit.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

V. Behold the handmaid of the Lord.
R. Be it done unto me according to thy Word.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

V. And the Word was made flesh.
R. And dwelt amongst us.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

V. Pray for us, O Holy Mother of God.
R. That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

Let us pray: Pour forth, we beseech thee, O Lord, Thy grace into our hearts, that we to whom the incarnation of Christ Thy Son was made known by the message of an angel, may by His Passion and Cross be brought to the glory of His resurrection; through the same Christ our Lord.

R. Amen.

Yeah.  That’s just the epitome of arrogance, isn’t it.  See?  That priest shot his mouth off and now tens of thousands of people just learned how to pray the Angelus as a direct result.  Heh.

"The Angelus" by Jean-Francois Millet.  You can see the church with the bell tower on the horizon.  This is how live really used to be.  Maybe someday it will be like this again.  After the counterrevolution....

“The Angelus” by Jean-Francois Millet. You can see the church with the bell tower on the horizon. This is how life really used to be. Maybe someday it will be like this again. Maybe someday the bells will ring again.  After the counterrevolution….

 

 


Starting Saturday Off Right

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

St. Bernadette, and her eyes.  This, being a photograph, almost makes one feel slightly uncomfortable as you can almost feel her looking through YOU.

St. Bernadette, and her eyes. This, being a photograph, almost makes one feel slightly uncomfortable as you can almost feel her looking through YOU.

Do read up on St. Bernadette, the visionary of Lourdes, France and her incorrupt body.  There is a great movie from the 1940s called “Song of Bernadette” which I recommed as well.  It was said by many eyewitnesses and neighbors of this young, illiterate Basque peasant girl that when she made the sign of the Cross, people would gasp and stare and the grace and beauty of her movements.

Hmmm.  One wonders how an illiterate peasant girl could possibly know anything about Christ, the Gospel and His Church if she couldn’t read the Bible or understand any language other than her native basque potois – most especially the “dead” language of Latin.

Hmmm.  So, “new Mass” in the local language with the priest facing and “engaging” the near-universally literate people … less than 5% of the miniscule percentage of remaining Mass-going Catholics have any idea what is going on or what the Church teaches, up to and including the existence of a Personal God.  Old Mass, in Latin, with priest facing God … illiterate peasant children are so saintly that the Blessed Virgin chats with them and uses them as vectors to confirm infallible dogmas.  (The Blessed Virgin confirmed to the Church and the world that she is The Immaculate Conception through Bernadette Soubirous.)

St. Bernadette, pray for us!