Author Archives: Ann Barnhardt

Starting Monday Off Right

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Christ the Democratically Elected Official.  NOT.  Deal, Americanist heretics.

Christ the Democratically Elected Official – NOT. Deal, Americanist heretics.

The Postcommunion of the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass from yesterday’s Feast of the Kingship of Our Lord Jesus Christ:

We have received the food of immortality and beg, Lord, that we who are proud to fight under the banner of Christ our King, may reign with Him forever in His realm above….

Wow.  That implies that we should be, like, FIGHTING, or something.  At least, that’s how I am interpreting the word “FIGHT”.  As, er, “FIGHT”.  But I’m sure that’s probably all wrong and Fr. Call-Me-Kevyn will email me and tell me how it is that the word “FIGHT” actually means “encounter and dialogue” and possibly “stare deeply into each other’s eyes and then engage in a long, lingering embrace of mutual respect and non-verbal affirmation”.

Nah.  Fight means fight.  FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

 

Musical Interlude: Sweet Surrender by Sarah McLachlan

While we’re waiting for the Slotted Spoon of Judgment and Discrimination auction to mature, let’s have a musical interlude.  Can you guess why I like this song?  Here are the lyrics (with my adjustment in red), straight out of ’97 and on VINYL even!  Enjoy!

It doesn’t mean much.
It doesn’t mean anything at all.
The life I’ve left behind me
Is a cold room.

I’ve crossed the last line
From where I can’t return.
Where every step I took in faith (MADE) me
And led me from my home.

Sweet surrender
Is all that I have to give.

Take me in.
No questions asked.
You strip away the ugliness
That surrounds me.

Are you an angel?
Am I already that gone?
I only hope that
I won’t disappoint You
When I’m down here
On my knees.

And I don’t understand
How by the touch of Your hand
I would be the one to fall.

I miss the little things.
I miss everything about You.

It doesn’t mean much.
It doesn’t mean anything at all.
The life I’ve left behind me
Is a cold room.

Barnhardt Estate Sale: The Slotted Wooden Spoon of Judgment & Discrimination

 

WoodenSpoonofDiscrimination

 

Ann Barnhardt’s Slotted Wooden Spoon of Judgment and Discrimination

My eBay handle is 720ann.  My PayPal I.D. is [email protected] .  Purchasing, bidding, looking or just merely thinking about any of this sends you straight to the top of some FEDGOV list, so you’ll have that going for you, which is nice.

Are you judgmental?  Are you prone to not merely discrimination, but discrimination with extreme prejudice?  Then do I have the spoon for you!  Have you ever stood over a pot of freshly-boiled dumplings and said to yourself, “I like dumplings.  Dumplings are good.  But the cooking water is bad.  I wish I had a tool to help me discriminate in favor of the dumplings and against the cooking water so I could serve the good and excellent dumplings to my family and friends and throw the cooking water into the sewer.  I don’t want to serve my family and friends nasty cooking water, but I don’t want to throw any good dumplings down the sewer, either.  If only there was a tool that could help me judge and then discriminate dumpling from wastewater.  Sigh.”

You are bidding on a slotted wooden spoon from the estate of Ann Barnhardt.  A spoon that allows you to judge and then discriminate with extreme prejudice – without ever having to leave the comfort of your own kitchen. It is made out of wood.  Very JUDGMENTAL, DISCRIMINATORY wood. In fact, when I originally purchased this spoon, I judged it and then discriminated against countless other spoons in its favor.  This spoon was literally borne from judgment and discrimination.  And now, all of that judgment, all of that discrimination can be yours.

Who am I to judge?  Who are you to judge?  I dunno.  This is why we have slotted spoons.  Oh, and this is also why we have the Church, the Magisterium and the Scriptures – so we can “judge all things” (1 Corinthians 2:15) and “prove all things; holding fast that which is good.” (1 Thessalonians 5:21).   No reserve.  Free shipping.  Ann Barnhardt has Tridentine Masses said for her benefactors.

I'll have a Manhattan, Up. Thanks.

1.  I have used every possible word for “miscellany” so now I’m going to title these mish-mash (used that too) posts with cocktail orders, because a little virtual drankin’ is in order, methinks.  A Manhattan is two parts Rye Whiskey, one part sweet vermouth and a dash of angostura bitters, shaken, served in a chilled martini glass with a marischino cherry garnish.  Nom nom nom.  Drinky-winky, Possum.

2.  Many, many thanks to the buyer and all of the bidders on the Rainbow whisk.  It sold for an amazing $350.  Your munificense never ceases to amaze me.  The next listing will be the Slotted Wooden Spoon of Judgment and Discrimination.  After that will be the Silicone Basting Brush of Dialogue and Encounter.

3.  I am really, really struggling to summon the energy to comment on the theatrics and farce in Washington.  I truly think that if at this point a person STILL doesn’t get that all politicians – ALL … ALL OF THEM are lying politicking whores and psychopaths who are in it purely for the money and personal powertrip and that all “politics” is pure, contrived theater that makes professional wrestling look like epitome of sincerity and truth by comparison, I’m just going to go ahead and call it and fill out the toe tag.

"It's utterly critical that we win back the Senate and the White House.  Yay America!"  Youbetcha.

The alternative is indifference.  So, I guess I’ll just have to keep beating my head on walls and pieces of sturdy furniture.  And rocks.  Rocks are good, too.

3.  There are now basically two camps on the ObamaCare website fiasco.  There is a camp that says that the site was built to crash and cause denial of service attacks on itself because the regime didn’t want people to see that insurance premiums are skyrocketing.  There is another camp of IT guys that says that the entire website is a Potemkin Village – that it is just a front-end facade with a data entry form, and that there is no real code underneath the facade to actually sell people insurance on an “exchange”.  This is VERY plausible.  When massive database code is written, it is broken up into tiny tasks with each task assigned to a team.  When the Red Team finishes Task A and the Blue Team finishes Task B, the Yellow Team is tasked with knitting the Task A code together with the Task B code.  And once that is done, that finished bit, called Part D is then married to Part E which was created in the same way, and that goes on and on for level upon level.  There are entire companies that do nothing but micro-manage these tasks and teams so that a massive, whole database project can be accomplished.  What this means is that an entire group or even company is totally unaware of what is going on elsewhere in the project, because all they focus on is their specific taskset.  So, the guys who wrote the front-end code would have no clue and no way of knowing that no one was writing any code to create a functioning insurance exchange.  Everyone would just ASSUME that it was happening – just not in their office, or even their company, and they would happily write and pass their code for their tasks up the chain assuming and trusting that the whole ObamaCare exchange project was, you know, REAL.  So… where did the $650,000,000.00 go?  Oh, I couldn’t even begin to hazard a guess…

They're smirking for a reason.  It's because they are stealing all of your money, and you refuse to stop them.

They’re smirking for a reason. It’s because they are stealing all of your money, and you refuse to stop them.

4.  For your “Fruits of Francis” file:

Ann,
Today I went to Mass at a [Novus Ordo] Parish I try to avoid but I woke up late and wasn’t able to attend the Maronite Mass I usually attend during the week.  Five minutes before Mass began a woman stood up and said “Let’s recite the Angelus,” and we did.  The readings today were about Christ rebuking the Pharisees and wouldn’t you know it but the priest used the readings to point out in his sermon the arrogance of praying devotions and the fact that saying them “MEANS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING” unless you have inside you a burning heart like Jesus helping the needy blah blah blah.

Now, you might say that the priest is right, but no.  Praying devotions like the Angelus and the Rosary are NOT contingent on whether or not you FEEEEEL something.  You should pray them even if you feel numb and spiritually bone dry.  You should pray even if you are angry, sad, pooped or frustrated.  You should pray if you feel like a zombie and find yourself without a single flying flip left to give.  In fact, it is in those times that some of the most intense infusions of grace occur.  The key is remembering that God is the actor and He really doesn’t need you to be all “jazzhands for Jesus” if He wants to go to work on you.  In fact, let’s just say what needs to be said here:  99.9% of the “jazzhands for Jesus” schtick that you see is fakety-fake-fake-fake.  Forced smiles, ponderous lip-biting, hand-waving, sing-songy insincere speech inflections, GLAZED, EVASIVE EYES.  Blecgh.

What praying these devotions, and most especially going to Mass and Adoration, does is open the door for Him.  Remember, God is a Gentleman and will never come over uninvited, much less break in by force.  Even if all you can do is unlock the door and barely leave it ajar and then lay down in a puddle, that’s fine.  But you have to give Him a way in.  The Angelus, the Rosary, Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament and ESPECIALLY Mass – just do it.  Even if you think your heart is an ice-cold lump of coal before, during and after.  We generally do not physically or consciously perceive the infusion of grace in real time.

Hey!  So let’s take these Fruits of Francis and make a smoothie!  Let’s all learn the Angelus!  It was traditionally said at 6:00am, noon and 6:00pm.  All of the churches used to ring their bells, and everyone would stop and say the Angelus.  It is a prayer of thanksgiving for the Incarnation – God taking on human flesh.

V. The angel of the Lord declared unto Mary,
R. And she conceived by the Holy Spirit.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

V. Behold the handmaid of the Lord.
R. Be it done unto me according to thy Word.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

V. And the Word was made flesh.
R. And dwelt amongst us.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

V. Pray for us, O Holy Mother of God.
R. That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

Let us pray: Pour forth, we beseech thee, O Lord, Thy grace into our hearts, that we to whom the incarnation of Christ Thy Son was made known by the message of an angel, may by His Passion and Cross be brought to the glory of His resurrection; through the same Christ our Lord.

R. Amen.

Yeah.  That’s just the epitome of arrogance, isn’t it.  See?  That priest shot his mouth off and now tens of thousands of people just learned how to pray the Angelus as a direct result.  Heh.

"The Angelus" by Jean-Francois Millet.  You can see the church with the bell tower on the horizon.  This is how live really used to be.  Maybe someday it will be like this again.  After the counterrevolution....

“The Angelus” by Jean-Francois Millet. You can see the church with the bell tower on the horizon. This is how life really used to be. Maybe someday it will be like this again. Maybe someday the bells will ring again.  After the counterrevolution….

 

 


Starting Saturday Off Right

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

St. Bernadette, and her eyes.  This, being a photograph, almost makes one feel slightly uncomfortable as you can almost feel her looking through YOU.

St. Bernadette, and her eyes. This, being a photograph, almost makes one feel slightly uncomfortable as you can almost feel her looking through YOU.

Do read up on St. Bernadette, the visionary of Lourdes, France and her incorrupt body.  There is a great movie from the 1940s called “Song of Bernadette” which I recommed as well.  It was said by many eyewitnesses and neighbors of this young, illiterate Basque peasant girl that when she made the sign of the Cross, people would gasp and stare and the grace and beauty of her movements.

Hmmm.  One wonders how an illiterate peasant girl could possibly know anything about Christ, the Gospel and His Church if she couldn’t read the Bible or understand any language other than her native basque potois – most especially the “dead” language of Latin.

Hmmm.  So, “new Mass” in the local language with the priest facing and “engaging” the near-universally literate people … less than 5% of the miniscule percentage of remaining Mass-going Catholics have any idea what is going on or what the Church teaches, up to and including the existence of a Personal God.  Old Mass, in Latin, with priest facing God … illiterate peasant children are so saintly that the Blessed Virgin chats with them and uses them as vectors to confirm infallible dogmas.  (The Blessed Virgin confirmed to the Church and the world that she is The Immaculate Conception through Bernadette Soubirous.)

St. Bernadette, pray for us!

Barnhardt Estate Liquidation Auction: Ann's 100% Heterosexual Rainbow Whisk

Well, as much as I hate it, it’s time to list some items on eBay again.  I think there might still be some hot beverage mugs remaining (trenchmouth included FREE!), but this time we’re going back to the straight-up auction and my 100% Heterosexual Rainbow Whisk.

My eBay handle is 720ann.  My PayPal handle is my email address, [email protected] .

Thank you in advance for your consideration and extreme munificence.  Ann’s estate liquidation is consecrated to the Infant Jesus of Prague.

HeterosexualWhisk

You are bidding on a whisk from the estate of Ann Barnhardt.  This whisk has its spindles coated in a silicone-plastic so that it will not scratch or harm your non-stick coated pots and pans.  The silicon coating on the spindles is in a beautiful and festive rainbow motif, which will remind you with every use of God’s promise to never again drown us all in a monster flood, no matter how wretched and degenerated the human race becomes.  This is consoling.  Sadly for this excellent whisk, the rainbow motif has been recently coopted by the homosexualist movement.  This whisk wants you to know that it is 100% heterosexual and is not attracted to other whisks, but instead to cutlery, as is natural.  Many a night would I hear the soft, muffled sobs of this whisk, tucked safely in its compartment in my utencil drawer, “Why does everyone think I’m ….  Just because my spindles are rainbow-colored doesn’t mean I’m….”   Fight the unjust coopting of the rainbow color motif by the homosexualists.  End a young rainbow whisk’s pain.  Welcome it into your home.  But you have to promise that you won’t keep it in the same compartment as the knives.  That would be scandalous. No reserve.  Payment by PayPal.  Free shipping.  Ann has Tridentine Masses said for her benefactors.

 

Starting Tuesday Off Right

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

If eyes were assault weapons, those would be .338 Lapuas.

That is St. Teresa of Avila.  If eyes were assault weapons, those would be .338 Lapuas.

“The most potent and acceptable prayer is the prayer that leaves the best effects. I don’t mean it must immediately fill the soul with desire . . . The best effects [are] those that are followed up by actions—–when the soul not only desires the honor of God, but really strives for it. “

“Remember that you have only one soul; that you have only one death to die; that you have only one life, which is short and has to be lived by you alone; and there is only one Glory, which is eternal. If you do this, there will be many things about which you care nothing. “

St. Teresa, pray for us!

Quote Collection: Indifference, Inertia and Ignorance

“The person who does not become irate when he has cause to be sins. For an unreasonable patience is the hotbed of many vices. It fosters negligence, and stimulates not only the wicked, but above all, the good to do wrong.”

–St. John Chrysostom
c. ARSH 347-407

Here is a short excerpt from the book “New Grub Street” by George Gissing published in ARSH 1891.  It is available free online.  I originally sourced it from John Senior’s “The Death of Christian Culture”.  Emphases mine:

Jasper changed the topic of conversation, and presently Whelpdale was able to talk with more calmness. The young man, since his association with Fleet & Co., had become fertile in suggestions of literary enterprise, and at present he was occupied with a project of special hopefulness.

‘I want to find a capitalist,’ he said, ‘who will get possession of that paper Chat, and transform it according to an idea I have in my head. The thing is doing very indifferently, but I am convinced it might be made splendid property, with a few changes in the way of conducting it.’

‘The paper is rubbish,’ remarked Jasper, ‘and the kind of rubbish—oddly enough—which doesn’t attract people.’

‘Precisely, but the rubbish is capable of being made a very valuable article, if it were only handled properly. I have talked to the people about it again and again, but I can’t get them to believe what I say. Now just listen to my notion. In the first place, I should slightly alter the name; only slightly, but that little alteration would in itself have an enormous effect. Instead of Chat I should call it Chit-Chat!’

Jasper exploded with mirth.

‘That’s brilliant!’ he cried. ‘A stroke of genius!’

‘Are you serious? Or are you making fun of me? I believe it is a stroke of genius. Chat doesn’t attract anyone, but Chit-Chat would sell like hot cakes, as they say in America. I know I am right; laugh as you will.’

‘On the same principle,’ cried Jasper, ‘if The Tatler were changed to Tittle-Tattle, its circulation would be trebled.’

Whelpdale smote his knee in delight.

‘An admirable idea! Many a true word uttered in joke, and this is an instance! Tittle-Tattle—a magnificent title; the very thing to catch the multitude.’

Dora was joining in the merriment, and for a minute or two nothing but bursts of laughter could be heard.

‘Now do let me go on,’ implored the man of projects, when the noise subsided. ‘That’s only one change, though a most important one. What I next propose is this:—I know you will laugh again, but I will demonstrate to you that I am right. No article in the paper is to measure more than two inches in length, and every inch must be broken into at least two paragraphs.

‘Superb!’

‘But you are joking, Mr Whelpdale!’ exclaimed Dora.

‘No, I am perfectly serious. Let me explain my principle. I would have the paper address itself to the quarter-educated; that is to say, the great new generation that is being turned out by the Board schools, the young men and women who can just read, but are incapable of sustained attention. People of this kind want something to occupy them in trains and on ‘buses and trams. As a rule they care for no newspapers except the Sunday ones; what they want is the lightest and frothiest of chit-chatty information—bits of stories, bits of description, bits of scandal, bits of jokes, bits of statistics, bits of foolery. Am I not right? Everything must be very short, two inches at the utmost; their attention can’t sustain itself beyond two inches. Even chat is too solid for them: they want chit-chat.’

Jasper had begun to listen seriously.

‘There’s something in this, Whelpdale,’ he remarked.

We aren’t “quarter-educated” today.  Oh, no.  People today are something like “one thirty-second educated” or “one sixty-fourth educated”.

Next, a quote from Cardinal Pie, who lived back in the good old days when being a Cardinal was a function of true merit.  Cardinal Pie also lived in the late 1800s, and was a favorite of Pope St. Pius X.  After reading this, I’m sure you will be able to guess why.

“Is not ours an age of mis-lived lives, of un-manned men?

Why?

Because Jesus Christ has disappeared. Wherever the people are true Christians, there are men to be found in large numbers, but everywhere and always, if Christianity wilts, the men wilt. Look closely, they are no longer men but shadows of men. Thus what do you hear on all sides today? The world is dwindling away, for lack of men; the nations are perishing for scarcity of men, for the rareness of men. I do believe: there are no men where there is no character; there is no character where there are no principles, doctrines, stands taken; there are no stands taken, no doctrines, no principles, where there is no religious faith and consequently no religion of society.

Do what you will: only from God you will get men.”

And to confirm what Cardinal Pie said above, a large-scale study has been completed of Novus Ordo Catholics in English speaking countries, and the results show that only 5%, FIVE PERCENT, are actual “intentional desciples”.  Many do not believe in the divinity of Christ, or even in a Personal God – but rather a “force”, or nothing.  I can confirm these findings anecdotally.  I’ll never forget the email from the weekly Mass attending Catholic woman who told me how stupid I was because everyone knows that “Jesus isn’t God.  Jesus is God’s son.”  In my reply to her, which I rarely do, I not only corrected her, but also took the opportunity to tell her that He was physically present in the Eucharist.  I doubt very much that she believed me, but at least I tried, and perhaps planted some sort of seed.

“[W]e have asked hundreds of diocesan and parish leaders from sixty dioceses throughout the English-speaking world this question: What percentage of your parishioners, would you estimate, are intentional disciples? To our astonishment, we have received the same answer over and over: ‘Five percent.’”

More troubling still is her discovery – after working with hundreds of parishes, and personally interviewing a couple thousand practicing Catholics, most of whom described themselves as “active” and “heavily involved” in their parishes – that many of them have tremendous gaps in their understanding of the faith.  They might be in Church every Sunday: ushers, lectors, parish secretaries, religious ed teachers [Say it. “Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion”.] and so on. Yet Weddell not infrequently discovered many who – upon sharing with her their own experience of the faith – did not believe in the divinity of Jesus, or who intimated that that they don’t even believe in a personal God at all! Her personal experience in these one-on-one encounters seems to confirm one of the most disturbing implications of the Pew study.

So, to review, more than 80% of Catholics simply stopped going to Mass at all beginning in the late 1960s when the Mass was turned into the effeminate, devirilized, illicit-yet-valid abomination that is the Novus Ordo.  More yet have trailed off or joined pagan pantheistic protestant self-worship Sunday entertainment houses.  Of those that actually remain in Novus Ordo parishes, only 5% can be called “intentional disciples”, meaning authentic Catholics who actually believe what the Church teaches on any level.  So… five percent of less than ten percent.

1 x 0.1 = 0.1
0.1 X 0.05 = 0.005
0.005 = One half of one percent.
And this happened largely, not entirely, but largely, since ARSH 1968.  45 years.  Not 450.  45.

This is why a plurality of self-identifying Catholics today voted for Obama and are in favor of sodomite faux-marriage.

One last quote:

“The Church is not falling to pieces. It has never been better. This is a wonderful moment for the Church, you just need to look at its history.”
Pope Francis Bergoglio
September 16, ARSH 2013

It is going to get worse.  We are going to be made to suffer, and so we should because it is our responsibility to do something – anything – and we’re not getting it done on any level.  Not even close.

History Rhymes: ObamaCare Website and the Ukrainian Wheat Farmers

The fact that the ObamaCare website is a complete clusterbungle that is totally inoperative is 100% INTENTIONAL.

It was designed to cause denial of service attacks on ITSELF, people.  Come on.  Wake up.  This isn’t difficult.

This reminds me exactly of the Ukraine under Stalin in the early 1930s.  The Ukraine is the breadbasket of eastern Europe.  Tremendous farming and wheat production was centered in the Ukraine.  Under Lenin, and then Stalin, all farms and food production were seized and controlled by the state.  The Soviets hated the Ukrainians and wanted them all dead.  All of them.  So here’s what they did:

At wheat planting time, the farmers all went to the Soviet office in town to get their allocation of seed wheat to plant for that year’s crop.  The Soviets stalled and stalled and then simply refused to give the Ukrainian farmers any seed.  As the planting window narrowed day by day, and then finally closed, the farmers became first ever more urgent, and then resigned themselves in despair to the fact that they would have no crop that year.

Fast forward to wheat harvest time.  The Soviet bureaucrats showed up at the farms and demanded that the farmers deliver that year’s wheat crop harvest.  The farmers, in complete disbelief at the Soviets after having begged and pleaded for seed a few months earlier only to be ignored and then explicitly denied any seed by these very same Soviet bureaucrats, told them that there was no harvest because YOU REFUSED TO GIVE US ANY SEED.

The bureaucrats then accused the farmers of hiding and hoarding the wheat harvest, and summarily executed all of the men and teenaged boys on the spot as “enemies of the Revolution and the people”.  Those were the lucky ones.  The Ukrainians left alive then slowly starved to death, many descending into the madness of starvation.  Many Ukrainian women, insane with hunger, slaughtered, cooked and ate their own children.  Some of those women survived the famine and carried the intense guilt of what they had done for the rest of their lives.  Before this totally state-engineered famine was over, upwards of three million Ukrainians were dead in less than two years.  This event is called The Holodomor.

This is what people who have hoarded an entire wheat harvest and gorged themselves on bread look like.  Clearly.  We know, because the nice people with the Hammer and Sickle shirts told us so.

This is what people who have hoarded an entire wheat harvest and gorged themselves on bread look like. Clearly. We know it is true because the nice people with the Hammer and Sickle shirts told us so.

This ObamaCare website is similar in tactic.  You are going to be punished for failing to comply with ObamaCare, even though the regime has specifically and maliciously seen to it that compliance is impossible – not that any person of conscience should even attempt to comply with the satanic ObamaCare anyway.

It’s intentional.
It’s intentional.
It’s intentional.

History rhymes.  Like an Irishman’s dirty limerick.

You people had better man up and do something real and concrete to depose these neo-Stalinist psychopaths.  Mere talk and hand-wringing leads straight to mass graves.